So here’s the thing.
I’ve got ninety-nine wonderful followers of this blog.
And…
…I’d like to get one more.
There I’ve said it.
I’ve admitted to you all that I am nothing but a shameless approval-seeking dopamine fiend, and frankly I’m absolutely fine with it. I even went to the trouble of referencing a well known pop song with my header photo.
Just imagine the other 88 balloons are there, don’t be so bloody picky.
I’m trying to do this the honourable way by writing a post about it but mark my words if my one-hundred-and-second post to this blog (too right I’m playing the look-how-much-I’ve-given-to-you-all-already card) looks like it isn’t going to appeal to someone new then I will resort to tags of a sexual nature.
I may be cheap but at least I’m dirty as well.
Fine, I’ll throw in a virtual flake for the lucky one hundredth follower (and simultaneously confuse anyone who didn’t grow up in the UK and have occasional access to an ice cream van)
How about a haiku?
Ninety-nine is great
But willing to barter spleen
To crack one hundred
Some ninety-nine word fiction? No problem.
*
The door to number ninety-nine is ajar as usual. Actually it’s a lid of a jar but who’s counting. Inside the grand, glassy and slightly marmaladey entrance hall an agent inspects the bottles of beer adorning a low retaining wall, afraid that at any given moment one might accidentally fall.
Not on his watch.
The mice are in again tonight.
Three of them. Ray, Stevie and Jeff.
Each of them blind. Each of them brilliant.
They play blues on a modified piano with six extra white and five extra black keys.
A dog howls for no reason beyond word-count.
*
Don’t make me beg. Not again.
If there were hooks made entirely of tenter I’d be on them right now.
Header image: “Flickr-3705507804-original” by technicolor76 – http://www.flickr.com/photos/technicolor76/3705507804/. Licensed under CC BY 2.0 via Wikimedia Commons – https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Flickr-3705507804-original.jpg#/media/File:Flickr-3705507804-original.jpg
Nik Eveleigh 
We are teetering with you on the precipice of numerology
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Keep teetering Diane – not even a nibble as yet. Honestly. I pour my heart out, produce my best poem and a 99 word story that is clearly borderline genius and where does it get me? To bed and up again in the morning, that’s where.
Some might suggest I stop procrastiblogging and write something new… 🙂
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I am smarting at the shear scale of the prostitution here, yet I must still ask, did it work? Did you scale the 100 mountain?
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I am pleased to report that all is well with the world and it remains filled with good people Nicola – I was completely and utterly unsuccessful in my attempts. It’s good to know that the writing and reading community will not fall for such tricks 🙂
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What a bunch of self-righteous upstarts eh? 😉 you should probably have offered cash.
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With an exchange rate of twenty one Rand to the Pound I might need to photoshop a kitten, a shotgun and a list of demands 🙂
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“A dog howls for no reason beyond word-count.” – Hahahaha 😀
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Funnily enough Shannon, when I wrote that line I had a feeling you’d single it out if you read this piece! Glad I wasn’t wrong and that it gave you a laugh 🙂
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You know my tastes well!
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Great minds and all that…!
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