Slated For Failure

See? See what I did there? I used this week’s word prompt in the title to cleverly alert you to a number of pertinent* facts, such as:-

It’s Wednesday!

It’s my weekly adhoc fiction 150 word competition entry failure post!

The word prompt was Slate!

*  rest assured, I dealt with the impertinent ones swiftly and without even a passing nod to mercy.

And so with no further ado other than a brief pause to inform you I called this piece, On Second Thoughts, The Bill, which can in no way be accused of being “ado” in any form, here is the aforementioned ok fine I’ll stop now…


“…then we have the exploration of chocolate devised by our in-house chocolatier. A smoked dark chocolate sponge with a molten white chocolate centre, cocoa butter sorbet, shaved cacao bean, milk chocolate fluid gel, white chocolate foam served on a tempered Valrhona chocolate edible plate. It also comes with a cocoa essence atomiser and a set of headphones playing sounds of a Peruvian cacao forest.”

“And your cheese board?”

“Also a good choice Sir. Seven regional cheeses specifically chosen by our in-house affineur complimented by an oat biscuit, black fig preserve, quince jam, apple gastrique, pickled walnuts, chive cracker, herb sourdough toast and served on a piece of Penrhyn slate.”

“It all sounds wonderful but I think I’ll just have a coffee.”

“Certainly Sir. Our in-house barista trained in Italy and can advise you on our range of single origin beans which are also available as a cold brew option…”


Thanks to for another fine image

10 thoughts on “Slated For Failure

  1. But it’s true isn’t it – it’s soddinwell true. They bring your food on a roof tile and tell you it’s got a jus and foam and a flak jacket and is related to King tut and they believe it – oh well – it’s better than the other option – All you can eat in a dustbin lid – eurgh. do you have the nerve to tell em to prove it though, you know to prove it’s not just a bit of cheddar with aspirations.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Beautifully put Diane. I’m all for upliftment and social equality but once you start tolerating cheddar with aspirations where is it all going to end? In a bloody great broccoli-air, cabbage-memory, juniper-essenced dystopian nightmare, that’s where.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You’ve beaten me to it this week Nik! Glad I was able to pick your story out from the rest of the dross/highly inventive entries, but clearly my vote was not enough!
    Reminds me of the time my other half and I went for a valentine’s meal (pre-children of course) to just such an establishment and were indeed served food on a slate consisting of pancetta foam and shards or something or other. Had to stop in at the chippie on the way home.

    Liked by 1 person

    • The fact that you found it and voted for it has made my day regardless 🙂

      I love your valentine’s meal memory – so funny! We did a lot of fine dining while still in the UK (and some here before the kids!) but there are moments when it becomes laughable. These days give me a quality home made burger and a chocolate milk shake and I’m a happy guy! I do miss a good chippie though – you can’t get a proper sausage in batter here for love nor money never mind a piece of cod 🙂

      Right…best I stop waffling and pop across to your site to check in as is becoming our weekly ritual!

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s