Our breaking story at the top of the hour…ruling party in turmoil as slush fund revealed to be “slightly frozen water”
Senior politicians are tonight distancing themselves from fresh allegations of corruption after two prominent Indian businessmen are seen leaving a Saxonwold shebeen with what eye-witnesses have described as a “leaky black holdall”. Moments later the pair were seen in a heated exchange where the taller of the two proclaimed “this is not the fifteen and twelfty million Msholozi promised us”.
Leading water expert Dr Jack Rezuvwah has studied CCTV footage of the incident and confirmed that the bag “was shipping a fair amount of water” and that the rate of the dispersal “was consistent with a semi-solid liquid of some kind”
Although there has been no official statement from Luthuli House on the matter, one senior ANC politician has been quoted as saying “this is quite clearly a racist marketing stunt by the white monopoly capital that funds the Slush Puppie corporation.”
More on this story in our next bulletin or as it happens…
Is that the reservoir, Dad?
Yes. What do you think? Was it worth the walk?
Yeah! It’s so pretty!
It does look lovely nowadays. Probably a lot prettier than the village ever was.
What village Dad?
The one that used to be here.
What do you mean?
That’s how they make reservoirs son. They take a village in a good catchment area and they move people out so they can flood it.
You’re joking Dad!
Nope. I’m dead serious.
Is that what happened for this reservoir?
Yes. Sort of.
What do you mean sort of?
I mean…they didn’t move everyone.
Just hit a cockroach.
Survived. Hid under the bed.
The cockroach, not me.